Trauma is what happens to a body & mind that survives. Trauma changes us, literally changes our brains: a brain that went through a traumatic incident works differently than a brain that has not. And trauma changes our body in many ways. Whether there are visible scars or not, there are places on our body that hold memories/images/flashbacks/pieces/feelings of the event(s) that changed us.
But still, the truth hidden in my body was that I started fucking men again not because I authentically desired them, but in some kind of unconscious wish to please my dead mother. And my body carried a lot of sadness about it.
De-centering the race/ethnicity & sexual preference/orientation of the victims is a form of erasure. Ignoring that queer & trans POC are more likely to be victims of violence allows that violence to continue.
The power that comes from recognizing how your healing journey mirrors the healing journey of your clients & how those healing journeys affect each other. And why you need to be clear on what healing you're receiving from the healing work you're offering in the world.
People often confuse "story" with "fiction" & in some contexts that is a completely valid equation. But when we're talking about stories of the body, that equation doesn't hold up so well. "Story" is the body's documentation of an event & how it makes sense of that event.
As a Queer Black Woman, I understand those difficulties. More importantly, I understand those difficulties somatically. It is not a theoretical understanding, not something I've read about or studied. It's a lived understanding: I feel those difficulties in my gut, they exist in my body with every step I take in the world.
Marginalized people bear a disproportionate amount of risk in the fight for social justice, so if you really want to have our backs, if you really wanna be part of the solution, you need to take on some of that risk. If you can't/won't/don't, then IMNSHO you are not actually "allied folk".
How does our work change when we acknowledge that our desire for a just world comes from the same place as the desire we have for our romantic partners? How do our organizing relationships change when we treat each other with the gentleness & care we give to those we desire?
Our lovers are witnesses to our deep vulnerability. Our lovers cherish us & want the best for us always & often put our needs before their own. Our lovers nurture us, provide a welcoming sanctuary from the often harsh world outside, & encourage us when we're stuck.
I see all of you as sacred. I believe that your erotic power is a fuel, a resource, an oracle; and I want you to have full access to that power. I believe that your body when integrated with your spirit, your mind, your emotions and your sexuality is the best guide you can ever have. I want you to be able to hear that guide when It speaks to you.